As I was dropping my husband off at the airport, he mentioned that my current attitude about turning 30 depresses him. I must confess that it depresses me, too. I just have this sinking feeling that life will never be as fun after this birthday. Yes, I realize this is irrational. Yes, my dear friend is currently kicking cancer's ass and has something real to complain about. Yes, I hear "30 is the new 20."
I look at everything differently now. Maybe this dread stems from all of my favorite things being replaced by a new attitude about them. For instance:
Traveling Through Europe
20's Sara All I need is Aimee, Amy, my filtered water bottle and my Visa.
30's Sara Will my baby be alright? Can I leave him for more than a week? Will this cause permanent damage? I should use this money to save for a new house.
Traveling anywhere
20's Sara I'll stop for gas and Starbucks and be there in a few hours.
30's Sara Do I have enough milk? Where is the emergency pacifier? We need to stop for a diaper change! Call them and tell them we're 2 hours behind schedule. Ugh- it's not worth it, let's just stay home.
Shopping
20's Sara Oooh! That's cute- should I buy it now or wait until Amy buys it and then borrow it?
30's Sara Is this on sale? Never mind, I'll just get spit-up on it. I don't really have anywhere to wear it to. How much money is in our account after buying diapers and an economy-sized box of wipes?
Going Dancing
20's Sara Who's bringing the pre-dancing wine? I'm going to wear Amy's new black dress!
30's Sara Wine makes me sleepy- I need an espresso. I need to pump or I'll leak all over Amy's dress and then she'll take away my closet privileges. I hope we come home early, the baby wakes up at 4. Just how strong are these control-top hose??
Ahhh....seasons. I was reminded of how seasons change as I was driving home and trying to decide if buying a Starbucks was too frivolous of a purchase. That thought would have never crossed my mind a few months ago. I have to laugh at it, and at myself. So, I must now reluctantly embrace the 30's Sara, because I think it's going to happen regardless of how I claw at my 20's.
1 comment:
I stayed in bed all day when I turned 35. That was the 'big one' for me. I don't know what happen to me that day, but the next day I caved into the age thing.
I became an old person at that age and I never looked back.
I hated it when people say you are as young as you feel, I think that is so 'clashea'. Age is much more serious to me than that. I now look at all people that are younger than me and ...yes I giggle serious about how someday (if the Lord has a sense of humor) they too will have saggy breast and druppy bottons. I strongly recomend duct tape. At the age of 40, I woke up, got out of bed, and to my shock---my botton hit the floor!!!BAM! down it went. Not to worry though---
I taped it all back up there with the duct tape (true story).
Stop laughing...it will happen to you too. We are all in this aging together.
auntie phil
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