Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Lessons from My 9-Month-Old



Being home with my little guy has forced encouraged me to be more contemplative and enjoy the small things. As he clapped delightedly for the colon cleanse commercial I was watching, I thought about how he makes me see the joy in everything.

Here's a few of my "Cale Lessons:"

-You never know if something is tasty unless you cram it in your mouth and clench your jaws so mommy can't fish it out.

-Any occasion is a good time to poo. Loudly and with gusto is the preferred method.

-Smearing spit and drool on a mirror is best when it's freshly Windexed. It's more artistic that way.

-It's holier to sing and shout to God when everyone else in church is quiet and reverent.

-If the outfit isn't comfy and play-worthy, it might as well stay in the closet. Even if Mommy spent a large sum at Baby Gap.

-Empty tupperware and a wooden spoon are better toys than anything Fisher Price could put out.

-Why have teeth if you can't practice biting Mom until she won't nurse anymore?

-Mommy will hurry faster if alligator tears are involved.

Yep, folks, I didnt learn this stuff in college.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love the picture__he is getting so big!
Oh my,(LOL) you sound as if you are fully engaged with the education and knowledge that you need to further evaluate and anticipate, as in the care of your little angel.
You will know dough be a walking... World Book Encyclopedia of Knowledge and Education before he turns 30.
You have join the ranks with most all mothers before he puts HIS child in your arms.
It is then you can smile in understanding... when his wife thinks you to be a totally old relic/incompetent and out of touch--- not to be trusted alone with HER newborn baby!
You too will know things (as I and all old and wise mothers come to know) as we patiently wait for our turn as inlaws:

At about three months into it or before--- she will be seeking out (be it family or friends)all warm bodies who will come and help her just to get a few more hours of sleep, or time, or some long or short 'fix' (if you will) of life before baby.
Things like taking a looong bubble bath, or going clothes shopping allll day looong with a girlfriend etc,etc.
YOU like me, in your wisdom, will not be hurt or affended when she clings to her newborn baby protectively for the first few months. You too will...
BE patent and know that in time she will let go and come to share with you... HER baby... YOUR grandchild. She will then come to allow you to help her, and not think you so unworthy.
You too like me, will be thankful, and you will love her for shareing... as I have.
Together, you all--mothers and grandmothers, will start the whole process all over again.
You'll look into to that little angel face, and all the while looking into his little angel eyes... melting with love, and be reminded once again of what is REAL and TRUE, and why we all do it, and why we all give our lives to do it.
Cale is giving you your BAT. degree NOW, but your grandchildren will give you your MASTERS in parenting.
In your life time you SHOULD have more than one degree_________all of them are important!
I am proud of you and will always be; you are and will always be (I say this with great affection) my 'baby girl Sara'.
I can't wait to see what happens next...your life is so full... in every respect!!!!! Keep us all posted. We all ador you...I speak for ALL you family and friends.

Jamie said...

Isn't mommy college so much fun. What is the name of our degeree?

Anonymous said...

YOMAMA degreed...of course!!!

Anonymous said...

And YOGRANDMA...degree.
NOTE---
YOGRANDMA...degree comes with special awards like:
The ICTLTP (inlightening children to listen to parents) award.
The ICTEH (inlightening children to eat health) award.
The ICTSG (inlightening children to set goals) award.
BUT...the biggest and most inportant award of all:
The HTLACFO (how to love and care for other's) award.