Friday, June 11, 2010

The Manliness Police

I am the mother of a boy. He likes to be outside, he loves being dirty and he has no tolerance for quiet activities. I must admit, some days I have no idea what to do with him, but I don't fret. I know that if I get out of line, I have the ever-faithful Manliness Police to keep me accountable as I raise my son.

Allow me to introduce:

Officer You-Give-Him-Too-Many-Baths:

*Bought his first cowboy hat, boots, John Deere tractor and shotgun.

Officer He-Can-Drive-If-He-Wants-To:

*Bought his first fishing pole, 4-wheeler and life-sized tiger.

Officer Don't-Let-My-Nephew-Attend-Princess-Parties-Ever-Again

*Bought his first baseball, bat and Transformers t-shirt

Officer They-Are-Not-Panties-They-Are-UNDIES

*Bought his first superhero t-shirt, toy cars and remote control.

This group of ever-vigilant watchdogs works tirelessly to keep me in the know of all things manly. If I mess up, they are faithful with a lecture, text or phone call. When my son pees outside, shows his muscles or smells like a puppy, I know they are happy with my mothering. When my son wanted to wear a sequined barrette to Target, there is much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

My bad.

1 comment:

Ty said...

Keep the girly stuff away from our boy, you. We are always watching. And get him out of gymnastics and put him in an ultimate fighting class.