Friday, October 23, 2009

I am Not Gwen Stefani

While getting my daily dose of celebrity gossip, I saw a picture that rocked me to my core. I felt despair. I felt old. I felt frumpalicious. (My new word for what I look like when I wear my yoga pants all day and neglect my hair and make-up.) I found this picture to be cruel to mothers everywhere:



Seriously, Gwen? How in the hell do you look that hot with a baby and a toddler?

So many things are missing from this picture:

-Baby vomit on your shoulder
-A pooch of baby weight that will never come off
-The diaper bag bigger than the baby
-The "is this really my life?" look on your face

It's time to step up my game. I'm going straight to the sink to brush my teeth, slather on some red lipstick and then throw on my high-heeled boots.

Because I will not be defeated by Gwen Stefani.

2 comments:

Minters - The Other Side of the Story said...

You forgot the tissue paper boobs sinking to the floor. :)

Leslie said...

I'm not a mother, no where near motherhood, and I never look that put together either. I think it has more to do with personal stylists and an assortment of other assistants than with anything else.